THIS FRIDAY, the first major Hollywood movie with an all-yellow cast since "Flower Drum Song" hits the screen. And the Asian-American community couldn’t be more proud. Especially of Lee-tsa Simpson, the overachieving, musically-gifted, red-wearing Buddhist and the Korean animators who made it all possible. In celebration of this milestone, Tripmaster Monkey presents a "groin-grabbingly transcendent" survey of Great Asian Moments in "Simpsons" History. Here, in order of appearance …

ONE FISH, TWO FISH, BLOWFISH, BLUE FISH (Season 2): Tired of the usual meatloaf, the Simpsons head for local sushi joint, The Happy Sumo, where Bart and Lisa grab the karaoke mic for a soulless rendition of "Shaft" while Homer orders the potentially poisonous delicacy fugu from Akira, a waiter played by George Takei. Unfortunately, the Master Chef is playing hide the lobster roll with his lady friend and an apprentice must prepare the toxic blowfish. Hilarity ensues. Our favorite moment: Bart ordering sushi. "Akira, my good man, I’d like two sharks, an octopus and an eel. Do you have any giant squid? The kind that drags men to their deaths?" [Akira]: "Not today."

MR. LISA GOES TO WASHINGTON (Season 3): Thanks to Lisa's patriotic winning essay in a Reading Digest contest, the Simpsons win a trip to Washington D.C. However, Lisa’s faith in democracy is shaken when she sees her local representative take a bribe to allow clear-cutting in Springfield National Forest. She writes a santimonious essay and loses to Trong Van Din’s essay, "USA, A-OK." Our favorite quote: From Trong’s winning essay, "When my family arrived in this country four months ago, we spoke no English and had no money in our pockets. Today, we own a nationwide chain of wheel-balancing centers. Where else but in America, or possibly Canada, could our family find such opportunity? That’s why, whenever I see the Stars and Stripes, I will always be reminded of that wonderful word: flag!"

LISA’S PONY (Season 3): After disappointing Lisa yet again, Homer tries to make amends by finally giving her the pony she’s always wanted and he can’t afford. But owning a pony is so expensive that Homer takes a second job, the graveyard shift at the Kwik-E-Mart, run by workaholic immigrant Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, Jr. Ph.D. Apu is an egregious stereotype of a funny-talking "curry face" with dubious business ethics. But he’s a complex human being compared to the other truly cartoonish types running around Springfield. Favorite scene: While training Homer, Apu opens his shirt to show his bullet wounds: "I won’t lie to you. On this job, you will be shot at. Here’s a pointer. Try to take it in the shoulder." Bonus: Love scene with Apu and his girlfriend Princess Cashmere, or is it Kashmir?

HOMER AND APU (Season 5): After getting food poisoning (twice) from Kwik-E-Mart food, Homer and the investigative news program "Bite Back with Kent Brockman" manage to get Apu fired. (He is replaced by actor James Woods doing role research.) But the Simposns become disenchanted with Kwik-E competitor Monstromart, and Homer decides to get Apu his job back. This entails a pilgrimage to the Kwik-E-Mart home office in India, also the worlds first convenience store, located at the top of the Himalayan mountains. Homer: "This isn’t very convenient." Apu:"Must you dump on everything we do?" Homer’s stupidity results in Apu not getting to speak to the CEO (sitting in a lotus position, sipping a Squishy). Apu eventually gets his job back by taking a bullet for James Woods during a store robbery. Our favorite moment: A depressed Apu walks in front of a pet store window advertising: "Today Only: Laughing Monkeys." Best line: Apu, describing a Bollywood video he is showing Bart and Homer: "I’m hoping you enjoy this movie. It made every Indian critic’s top 400 list."

MUCH APU ABOUT NOTHING (Season 7): In a typical Simpsonian non sequitur, a wandering bear on Evergreen Terrace sparks a massive wave of anti-immigration sentiment, forcing Homer to decide between supporting deportation legislation and his friend Apu, who it turns out is in the U.S. illegally. Homer then gets a crash course in American history as he helps Apu try to pass a citizenship test. This is the one "Simpsons" episode that notoriously xenophobic CNN anchor Lou Dobbs should be tied to a chair and forced to watch. Though the episode first aired more than a decade ago (May 5, 1996, to be exact), it still rings true today with its insights about politicians using the unsubtly racist immigration debate to mask much profounder governmental failings, and about how hypocritical Americans can be in wrapping themselves in the flag while often knowing less about their own country than foreign visitors do. Our favorite moment: When Apu gives a detailed answer about the political and economic causes of the Civil War, but is told by the proctor to just put down "slavery." Our favorite quote: [Homer] "Our schools are so jam-packed with immigrants, people like Bart have lost the will to learn!"

IN MARGE WE TRUST (Season 8): At the Springfield dump, Homer finds a box of Japanese dishwasher detergent called Mr. Sparkle. The face on the box looks just like Homer. So Homer contacts the manufacturer in Hokkaido, Japan, and is sent a promotional video for Mr. Sparkle, a bizarre TV commercial that features a two-headed cow, dancing women turning into Sumo wrestlers, and the floating head of Misutaa Supaakoru saying, "Aka ni taishite burei da!" ("I’m disrespectful to dirt!"). At the end of the video, the mascot is shown to be a result of a joint venture between two large Japanese conglomerates whose mascots, a fish and light bulb, merge to form Mr. Sparkle. Our favorite line: [Bart] "There’s your answer, Fishbulb." Bonus: Gedde Watanabe. aka Long Duk Dong from "Sixteen Candles," guest stars as a factory worker.

THE TWO MRS. NAHASAPEEMAPETILONS (Season 9): Just as he begins to enjoy his popularity as a swinging bachelor (complete with a yellow Pontiac Trans Am called "Longhorn"), Apu receives an unwelcome reminder of his pending arranged marriage. Desperate to escape the agreement, Apu claims to have already married Marge Simpson, but soon changes his tune when he meets his intended, Manjula, who’s a "ma-hot-mama" and smart to boot. Favorite lines: Marge is preparing for an Indian wedding, "I’ve got the extra wine glasses but I’m still short a tandoori oven, an elephant and four castrati." [Bart] "What’s a castrati?" [Marge] "I don’t know but I’m sure it’s something spicy."

I’M WITH CUPID (Season 10): As Kwik-E-Mart convenience store manager Apu worries that his wife Manjula is falling out of love with him because he is such a workaholic. To regain her affections he showers his wife with outrageously extravagant Valentine’s Day gifts and he’s making the other Springfield husbands are look bad! As his gifts grow increasingly grand, the Springfield menfolk attempt to foil his efforts, instigating a Valentine’s “massacre.” Guest starring Elton John. Best line: [Marge] "You’re a life saver, Apu. All the other stores are closed!" [Apu] "At 11:30?! But this is the peak hour for stoned teenagers buying shiny things!"

THIRTY MINUTES OVER TOKYO (Season 10): While banking online at a Springfield cyber-cafe geekily named "The Java Server," Homer loses the family’s vacation savings to Snake, America’s favorite recidivist. Desperate to replace the funds and make Marge happy, Homer follows Flanders’ advice and attends the Chuck Garabedian Mega-Savings Seminar. The family "mega saves" its way into plane tickets to Tokyo (expertly yoinked from Flanders’ hands by Homer) and begins their adventure in Japan. Once in Japan, Homer follows every American tourist’s instinctual drive to not leave home, even while away from home and insists the family eat at "Americatown," an American-themed restaurant. Their vacation properly started, Marge, Maggie and Lisa take in the gentler sights of Tokyo while Homer (who quickly develops a fondness for walking through rice paper walls) and Bart attend a sumo match. By the match’s end, the Simpson men are arrested: something to do with Homer twirling the Emperor above his head and tossing the startled sovereign into a dumpster full of sweaty mawashi. As their time in Japan comes to an end, Homer loses the family’s last million yen to the wind. (Is there a better way to show off your prison-honed origami skills than by folding money into a crane?) Desperate (again) for cash, the Simpsons get a spot on "The Happy Smile Super Challenge Family Wish Show." After a series of exquisite Japanese game show tortures (mostly involving Homer’s head), they win tickets for the flight back home. Best moment: Homer and Bart in prison, quietly pursuing Japanese arts like overnight Lafcadio Hearns. Favorite line: Homer replaces "D’oh!" with "Shimatta, baka-ne!"

SHE OF LITTLE FAITH (Season 13): Desperate for money, the First Church of Springfield decides to rent out its wallspace to local advertisers (like realtor Cookie Kwan). Reverend Lovejoy does product-placement from the pulpit. And out front is a neon sign of Jesus (or Jebus, according to Homer). Horrified by the commercialization of her church, Lisa seeks spiritual enlightenment at the local Buddhist temple, where she’s converted by the world’s most famous Buddhist, Richard Gere (the Dalai Lama not withstanding). Best line: [Lenny] "Who’s Buddha?" [Gere] "It’s a good thing Buddha teaches freedom from desire, ‘cause I’ve got the desire to kick your ass."

THE SWEETEST APU (Season 13): Homer discovers that Apu is having an affair with the Squishy girl. Unable to keep this secret from Marge, it’s not long before Manjula finds out and asks for a divorce. The Simpsons do everything they can to get the couple back together (think of the children, all eight of them!) and eventually convince Manjula to take Apu back if he completes a list of tasks to prove his devotion to her. Favorite moment: Bart, wearing an elephant mask, says to Manjula: "I am Ganesh, your god. I order you two to reunite or I’ll suck your blood. Bleh, bleh!"

GOO GOO GAI PAN (Season 16): An episode apparently written by an angry Chinese dissident, it originally aired on March 13, 2005. Selma discovers she’s going through menopause and can no longer bear children. When a trip to the Springfield Orphanage fails, Lisa suggests adopting a baby from China. There’s only one catch: the Chinese Government requires that only married couples can adopt babies, and so Homer is roped into posing as her husband. The entire Simpson clan flies to China, with Marge posing as the "hot maid." Chinese adoption agency head Madame Wu (Lucy Liu) promises Selma that she will receive her baby in a few days. Meanwhile, Homer feigns a career in acrobatics. Big mistake. Homer ends up hospitalized following failed stunt, but Selma is still awarded her baby only to have it snatched away when Homer was caught kissing Marge. But Homer manages to rescue little Ling. The Simpsons hurry through Tian’anmen Square ("on this site in 1989, nothing happened"), where an angry, tank-driving Madam Wu confronts them and demands her baby back. Selma has a heart-to-heart chat with Madame Wu, who reveals she was raised by a single mother (her father choked on a ping pong ball). Mission accomplished: Selma leaves China with baby Ling, and Bart is replaced by a Chinese spy: "Don’t have a cattle, dude! Favorite scene: [Madame Wu] "Lisa, soon you will have a Chinese sister who will surpass you academically." [Lisa] "I don’t know. I’m considered pretty smart. [Madame Wu] "Well, Tibet was considered pretty independent. How’d that work out?"

KISS KISS BANG BANGALORE (Season 17): Mr. Burns outsources his nuclear plant to (where else?) India, and the world’s stupidest man, Homer Simpson (who else?), ends up in charge. It’s full of the self-lampooning, knowing sensibilities that turned Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, Jr., Ph.D., into perhaps one of 21st-century America’s most beloved animated characters-instead of an object of boycotts by Indian-Americans. Just two of the dumb but embarrassingly familiar Americanisms the episode tilts at: Americans’ habit of assuming that everyone from a foreign country, no matter how large or overpopulated, must know someone they know (once in India, Homer quizzes random strangers about the whereabouts of Apu’s cousin Kavi, and finds him on the second try); and the unspoken assumption that brown-skinned native people, given the chance, will worship any white Westerner as a god. Our favorite moment: That thrill Indiana Jones fans get when they see Homer dolled up as Mola Ram, the Kali-worshiping Thuggee from "Temple of Doom." Our favorite quote: Homer referring to Brahma as "Papa Smurf," Ganesh as "the Elephant Man" and Shiva as "Johnny Sixarms." •